I watched the latest interviews and performances form Tohoshinki this morning.

All I can say is, "wtf was that?"

That was not TVXQ. That just wasn't. Those were shells of the boys we know and love. They were emotionless, robotic and the tension was so thick it was permiating the air like jell-o.
They all sang beautifully as always, so at least that cohesion was still there, but I believe they are all broken mentally.

Their friendship now has a rift, which makes me believe that
1. They haven't seen each other for a while.
2. This issue hasn't been talked out amongst themselves.
3. Somehow, there is another part of this story we don't know.

Do I believe the rift can be crossed, yes I do. I am optimistic and I always will be. They can overcome this, but I believe they have to stop being so fucking uptight and just TALK. TALK, DRINK AND BE MERRY!!!!

To be honest I am slightly angry at TVXQ right now. I feel as though they aren't even trying, though I assume they most likely are.

Just talk boys. Just talk. Work things out. Be the friends I know you are deep down inside. Please, for everyone's sakes. Nothing will come out of this but sadness, you know it boys, you know it. Just love each other again.

You are throwing away way too much. You really are.

I will always keep the faith. I am not leaving. Not until you tell me to.

I love you TVXQ. I really do. Work it out.

YOU ARE SO PURDY!!!!! *luvs him*



Yunho and Changmin look so sad though, sad and/or looking very out of it. I wish they would have all left together (as in the five of them) to go to Japan. It just seems so....broken....like they want to cross the rift but they can't. IT REALLY SUCKS! *hugs them all* I hope that when they get together in Japan they get to talk, get to know each other once again, remember why they were brought together in the first place.

Thanksgiving soon! ^-^ Turkey and pie FTW!

Never, because I am a college student and poor as fuck. ^-^

So, I won't say that it was a waste of 2:30 minutes of my life, because hell, I got to look at THIS BEAUTIFUL SPECIMEN....





Oh jesus christ on a cracker I almost went into orgasmic bliss each time this incredibly sexy man struted across the screen. Can this guy act....eeeh, not so much, but HELL HE IS SO PRETTY AND I WANT THE PRETTY! (He is soo sooooo much hotter than Robert...really he is!) How can you be 'just friends' with that? *smacks Bella* If you don't want him I'll take 'em!

More rants about the movie under the cut:
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JaeChunSu appeared on MKMF's new award show MAMA last night.
Only the three of them.
To accept an award on behalf of TVXQ.
At first I was sad, because Yunho and Changmin were not there, but I figure I know why they didn't go and their reasons behind not wanting to attend.
I was fine with just JCS going up to accept the award. I really was. I didn't care. As long as they said something to comfort me and fans...and they did.

"If you are watching, my two friends, I just want to say, I love you." -Jaejoong

If this doesn't scream to us fans to ALWAYS KEEP THE FAITH....what does?

That statement, no matter how sad Jae looked while saying it, meant so so much. I personally, had wanted to hear how they felt, and that statement....just cemented the fact that even through tough times, friendship can prevail.

TVXQ and SM Entertainment...work this out. Neither side would really be gaining anything anyways from this 'he-said, they-said'. Just work it out like adults should. Sit down, SM, just back off a bit and realize that you could be loosing the biggest band that could get you even farther than they are now, TVXQ, remember your friendship and the hard work you did TOGETHER that got you to where you are now.

And personally, I have never said this about ANY fandom, nor have I honestly felt this way about a fandom, but:

I love you TVXQ. I really do. Stay together. Continue to grow, continue to fly, continue to smile.

- Have an environmental geology test tomorrow, it shouldn't be too hard, but I am not getting my hopes up, this teacher is a little hard to interpret.
- Has just finished her Geology homework which took her 3 1/2 hours. *headdesk*
- Has no idea what she is going to do for tutorial and tutorial is in 2 hours. (UPDATE: I'm doing comic strips...or chicken strips like one of my girls called them, though paper and pens are nowhere near the deliciousness which is chicken fried...I am a fucking genius bitches.)
- Doesn't want to go to RA meeting, because heck, she's had enough bad information for one day.
- I am anxious about going to a doctor about my anxiety. (Sad isn't it.)
- Hates when teachers tell the Japanese girls that they can print their homework on the computers for free. Because then, I have to tell the Japanese girls that, no, printing anything will be 5 cents and then I become the bad guy.
- My shower head is broken, once again. Its been a piece of shit since I moved into my dorm, but now it won't stay at the awesome 60-some degree angle I had loved it at, and now is pointing at a 90 degree angle towards my tub floor. Not conducive to bodily washing...especially when the actual streams of water don't/nor have they ever actually pointed AT me. (They point up, down, swirl around and to the far wall...but not at my person.) Not to mention the water pressure is shit. But will maintenance fix it...no, they will tighten my shower-head and then say, "OMG...its a miracle." *rollseyes*
- Internet is so slow here and so wonky that I feel like taking the wireless off the wall and throwing it into a fire to happily watch it melt. (But then, I would be without internet at all and that would be worse than slow internetz....so I guess I'll just deal.)
- Hates it when girls use the excuse, "I have my period." as an excuse to leave school. COME ON...I have a period too, just take a Midol and go to school, THEN come home and procrastinate.
- Must clean my bathroom. *looks at her bathroom* Fuck.
- Must clean dishes. *looks at dishes* Fuck.
- Must deliver packages at UPS Store. *looks at packages* FUCK.
- Must return rented movies. *looks at movies* FUCKITY FUCK FUCK TO THE FUCK!!!

Nothing else to report...for now.

Dear TVXQ,

I trust you five to do the right thing. I trust you five as FRIENDS, that you will stick together for each other in times of need. I trust that you five listen to your fans and listen to the love and prayers being sent your way from MILLIONS of us across the globe.
We love you, we only want you to be happy, to be successful.

Jaejoong, Yoochun and Junsu. You three I do not believe are shallow, incoherant or ignorant as SM Entertainment is claiming. But I do believe you need to remember who has always been behind you, who always has your back, and whom you would be letting down if for some reason you feel you need to leave the group which made you a super-star. I understand the complications surrounding your case right now, I understand you aren't happy. But the fans here are worried. Please, if you can, give us a sign of your plans. We need the encouragement. We love you all so much. I love you all so much. My deepest wish and hope is to see you all (all five of you) together as a group once more. Work it out. Please, just work it out. Pride can only get you so far.

Changmin and Yunho. I still feel as though your "statements" released by SM Entertainment were falsities. Maybe not all of it, but most of it. I couldn't believe you could say such things to the other men you called friends and confidants. If I know you like I think I do, I just cannot believe anything until I hear it from your mouths. I do not believe you are giving up on TVXQ, nor do I believe you are perpitrating the enemy. I believe you are doing the ONLY thing you could do. I still trust you. I still love you.

I hate no one. I believe no one. Not until I see you five with my own eyes. I hope everything will work out. I am keeping my faith, keeping positive, and sending you love from across the ocean. I hope someday soon, I will see my TVXQ fly once again.

Aiishiteru TVXQ. Aiishiteru.

To the fans who have decided to give up on TVXQ...
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Who sleeps in bed next to you?
My little stuffed Panda

Have you ever lied to a teacher to get out of a deadline?
only a few....*cough* times.

What kind of books do you read?
All kinds, I love to read books, so if you put one in front of me, I'll read it.

What's your occupation?
Resident Assistant at a local Japanese women's University

What's really creepy?
Long, dark hallways

Who is your celebrity crush?
Choikang Changmin of TVXQ

What's your current obsession?
TVXQ

What are you listening to right now?
Hello Seattle - Owl City

What food could you eat every day for weeks and not get sick of?
Bacon, Lettuce, Tomato and Avacado sandwiches

What websites do you always visit when you go online?
livejournal.com
DBSK Sleepless Nights
peopleofwalmart.com
failblog.org
angryasianman.com

What was the cutest thing you've seen today?
A little girl with the cutest little pigtails said HI to me as I walked past the nursery to go to school.

Does food affect your mood?
Sometimes

What is your favorite kind of cheese?
Smoked Gouda

Do you want to learn another language?
Already have

5 things you do when you wake up.
1. slam hand on alarm clock
2. go pee
3. turn off my fan
4. brush my hair
5. put on face (a.k.a. makeup)

Do you have any cows?
So is that what we are calling my Japanese girls these days?

What are you looking forward to?
Dance and Taiko class

Everyone keeps telling me I am being too positive about the whole TVXQ debaucle.

Well, its the only way I can get through this really. I have to stay positive.

I can't just think, "TVXQ will break up. There is nothing I can do. JaeChunSu just hate HoMin and the other way around. They will never be the same, I don't think I like this."

I JUST CAN'T THINK THAT WAY.

Yes, maybe I am being a bit too positive, but hell, what if I want to be?

To be honest, I believe TVXQ will make it through this tough time. Will they come out the same, no...most likely not. Will this whole situation make them different personally, no, I don't think so. They will always be the five men we all came to know and love.

Even if they do break up, I will continue to be their fan. I am ready for a break up if that is what it ultimately comes down to. Follow the five members in their solo careers, support them as TVXQ but just seperately. If they are happier that way, I will support them. Its just hard to believe that these five men, seeming like such good friends, would just up and forget each other so quickly. *shrugs*

But again, I believe TVXQ, someway, somehow, will make it through. Whether it be today, tomorrow or farther in the future, I don't believe it is the end for the Rising Gods of the East.

Avex is still there. Japan is there. What about Tohoshinki?

For now, I am keeping my faith. No matter what anyone says, no matter the false rumors spread.
I will continue to adore and cherish the five friends whom I believe are trying their best to stay together as 1.

Again, I may be totally wrong...but this is how I have to be.

SM Ent. may be backing down....hmmm, I am intrigued and excited yet holding it all in because of pessimism....but we'll see. I WANT TVXQ BACK!!!! *whines*

Anyways, nothing much has been happening in my life lately aside from over 75 Japanese girls coming down with the flu after homestay, my mother also coming down with the flu (but recovering well), and figuring out what to do with my girls in their last full month in America.

I feel excited for Changmin's drama, Paradise Meadow....I have a feeling it will be really good and I, for reasons that are obvious, can't wait to see Changmin's kissing scene. I don't understand why some fans are disturbed or angered by the TVXQ boys having kissing scenes. Its not like they are truly in love with the actress, nor it is true that the kiss is ruining their lives...they are men, ACTING, in a role that calls for a kiss scene. GET OVER YOURSELVES.
I think it is awesome they are finally coming out of their box of comfort and trying new things, I love it. ^-^

Wednesday I have the day off school which is awesome because of the holiday, Veterans Day...though I really don't believe many people actually celebrate that holiday anyways....unless by celebrating you mean spending money at the sales in the mall. *rollseyes*

I really want TVXQ to continue. I believe they can go soooo much father than they are now.

I want all 5 to continue.

I don't care how LONG it takes to get them back together. But I want them back together.

Am I selfish for wanting this?

Its hard to believe that just last year, in 2008, our boys (TVXQ) were raking in the ratings, taking out as the top selling album, breaking all the rules and records and ready to pretty much take over the world.

Now, their future hangs in the balance.

A HUGE entertainment company would be stupid enough to let their biggest band ever in their history, fall to the waist-side.

(If this is true) Five friends are now supposedly split because of idiotic pride.

Parents and families are at arms. (maybe...truth?)

While fans are wracking our brains trying to figure out if what we are hearing is all true and not falsified.

To be honest. If I have been lied to these past few months by JaeChunSu....I wouldn't honestly care. All I want is to see the fabulous five back together again. Friends again. Singing again. Breaking records again. Showing the WORLD what an amazingly talented group they are and still can be.

I am sick of the trial. I am sick of the fighting and low blows. I am SICK of not knowing the TRUTH. I am sick of SM Entertainment revealing ALL the "information" and "evidence" NOW...AFTER the trial ended. I am sick of the money and greed.

I JUST WANT MUSIC. I JUST WANT FRIENDSHIP.

I JUST WANT MY FANDOM BACK.

AND I WILL DO ANYTHING TO GET IT THAT WAY ONCE AGAIN.

http://community.livejournal.com/dbsg/4165284.html?view=133241508#t133241508

FUCK YOU SM. FUCK YOU.

Let me remind you SM. TVXQ, they are probably the biggest band you will EVER have EVER again in the history of your company. The most talented, honest, humble band. And yet, you seem so keen to letting them go.

If you "cared" so much for them you wouldn't be doing this. You are proving yourselves as being the greedy, money hogging assholes we all knew you were.

I know I don't know everything that is going on in this case. But to be honest. From what I DO KNOW...whoever you are that RUNS SM Ent...you need to re-evaluate your possitions.

My band will not die. You won't MAKE them die. AND HELL IF I WILL LET YOU STEAL AWAY THE ONE THING THAT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME AND MILLIONS OF OTHER PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD BECAUSE OF YOUR BEING BUTT-HURT OVER TVXQ BEING MORE AWESOME THAN YOU.

I may be from America, half the world away, but mark my words SM...us fans are more powerful than you think.

*raises her war torch*

ALWAYS KEEP THE FAITH. TVXQ FOREVER.

P.S. Just spouting anger and frustration here.

Since Halloween is my favorite holiday and all, I had to wish you all a happy one! Hope that your day of ghouls is full of fright, candy and sugar rushes!

Moving on.....

Things I want right now:

1. A romance novel that has a white female/asian male love interest. I am sick sick sick of vampires, white men/Native American men/pioneer men/white women. SICK. Especially since Asian, African American and Hispanic men are quite delicious in their own right.

2. Daniel Henney as the leading role in a romantic comedy. He is just DELICIOUS!

3. Lychee Bubble Tea Shake from Boba Bubble.

4. Changmin to start filming his drama so I can watch him act!!! XD

5. More DBSK/TVXQ all as 5 activities.

This video makes me horny. Just saying.

Changmin is radiating sex here. He just IS. *grabby hands*

So for the Host Family Match-Up, my girls wanted me to wear the yukata they had given to me as a gift. They helped me put it on and tie the obi...I felt incredibly pretty wearing it, and many of the other groups of girls thought if I went to Changmin dressed like that he would definetly "want my babies" as they put it. XD

I don't know about the Changmin part...but yes, I felt very pretty!

Another meme I did that told me I was an "Idealist Healer" personality.

Healers present a calm and serene face to the world, and can seem shy, even distant around others. But inside they're anything but serene, having a capacity for personal caring rarely found in the other types. Healers care deeply about the inner life of a few special persons, or about a favorite cause in the world at large. And their great passion is to heal the conflicts that trouble individuals, or that divide groups, and thus to bring wholeness, or health, to themselves, their loved ones, and their community.
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Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Since everyone in the DBSK fandom is talking about Yunho's kiss on HTTG and Changmin and Jaejoong's upcoming kisses in their respective dramas, I just had to talk about why Korean/Japanese dramas are just so damn funny to me:
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